the physical symptoms from this horrible grief are awful. my tummy hurts almost constantly. there's a vague ache in my chest. I'm often nauseous. headaches come and go. I am lying in bed right now with an enormous pressure in my stomach. I need to call the Dr. I really don't want to be medicated though. this anxious feeling already feels like it is taking a toll on me. I drank half a glass of red wine tonight hoping it would relax me.... it did not. it didn't even taste good. which is good I suppose.... in the grief literature, I'm earned of people turning to alcohol or food... neither of those sound all that good right now. also warned of potential martial problems. so far I feel like Patrick and I are totally leaning on each other. anxiety and depression'.well I do worry about both of those since I have suffered from anxiety a lot in the past and the occasional depression......I hate the anxiety feeling (as I feel out right now)......
Jill, I've been reading your blog since you posted the link to FB and I've been trying to find the right words...but they just don't come to me! All I can do is pray...pray that you get answers into what happened with precious Nolan, for the unanswered could harder than knowing the truth! I pray that your children have comfort again someday, and they (and you) get peaceful sleep! I pray that you can find a way to relieve yourself of your guilt and smile again! I pray that you and your husband continue to lean on each other and find comfort (of sorts) in each others arms! I wish there were words...but until then, please know, I pray for you and your family, and not a day goes by that y'all aren't in my thoughts!! (((hugs)))
ReplyDelete