it just hit me today, again, just how scared my kids really must be by all of this... think about it. it's a scary, scary thing.... you have a normal day with your big brother, he goes to bed, and he dies. it's awful. it's truly the most traumatic, awful, horrible, nightmarish thing. i am scared as hell. i know they are too. i need to be a little more understanding of all that they must be going through. i really do. they all have to feel it, even the ones who don't show it like logan and liam. ciara is wearing her fear on her sleeve... but the boys, they aren't. i see sadness in their eyes often, but not so much the fear. but think about it. they have to be scared. everything about this sucks.
btw, these pictures, i just found them on my camera yesterday. i thought i had already seen the final pictures i had of nolan that were probably taken earlier that same day, not sure how i missed these. there are a few others that i will probably put on my next post of him and ella. these were taken december 29th, 2012 in the evening...
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