dear Nolan

dear son, oh how i miss you, my boy....my sweet first born....

i miss your laugh.
i miss your smile.
i miss watching you draw.
i miss your creativity.
i miss your silliness.
i miss your helpfulness.
i miss hearing you talk about your animals.
i miss your voice.
i miss watching you push Ella in the swing or the stroller.
i miss you always doing a good job on your chores.
i miss your friendliness.
i miss watching you climb trees so tall that i was always so nervous to watch.
i miss reading your stories and poetry.
i miss your kisses.
i miss you doing the i love you sign when I'd drop you off at soccer or scouts.
i miss your positive attitude.
i miss your bedtime prayers.
i miss your love of the outdoors.
i miss you wanting to build fires in the fire pit.
i miss you building forts in the backyard.
i miss you always trying to do what was right.
i miss when you would get a mischievous grin.
i miss that sometimes you were the only one who could make Ella happy.
i miss watching you play soccer, soccer season is going to be so hard.
i miss your hugs.
i miss your love of pasta....we always have too much left over now.
i miss you deciding that it is "mom and dad day" out of nowhere and then conspiring with your siblings to surprise us with something.
i miss your love and knowledge of birds.
i miss reading to you.
i miss you reading to Ella.
i miss you taking Logan for walks in the neighborhood,especially to visit Larry.
i miss your long hair.
i miss your short hair.
i miss you wanting to cook eggs or ramen noodles to help with lunch.
i miss the loud,silly laughter when you and Liam had fun together.
i miss the epic wrestling matches.
i miss playing chess or apples to apples with you.
i miss your talks about co-op.
i miss giving you breathing treatments for your asthma.
i miss your love of scouts.
i miss your enthusiasm over rango.
i miss listening to you play the piano.
i miss the phase when you were drawing with your feet.
i miss how grown up you were getting.
i miss watching the last ten minutes of your gym class, you were always having such fun.
i miss your kind spirit.
i miss watching you sword fight with Liam or Logan or your friends.
i miss you playing your bongos.
i miss watching you dance.
i miss your enthusiasm when we would sing for school.
i miss your goodness.
i miss how well you would treat little kids parks,pools,wherever...

i miss everything about you.  if i were to sit here for the next eight hours,I'd still be writing things i miss about you.  i miss you from the deepest depths of my soul Nolan.